Monday, July 30, 2007

miami fever


spent my birthday week in miami. beach time, sauna like humidity, turquoise ocean brought all my good thoughts into one happy place. Oh, miami! Oh Delano Hotel! so many people to bitch about, so little time.
I am tanned. not worth the pain though. Bought one of them floaties. covered myself with SPF 30 lotion. laid in the water, at the tidal waves' mercy, looking at people, seagulls, talking to my friends, avoiding a bathing suit with no owner here, a hygienic towel there. When i got back to the room, I looked like a seared steak. Needless to say I spent the night hugging the aloe/lidocane ointment bottle.
back in LA, looking forward to prove myself: after all I'm one year older. A cold sore on my bottom lip keeps me grounded. Bought some Abreva medication. $17 fot the tiniest tube, only to discover that it has no ingredients that fight cold sores whatsoever. The only active ingredient is alcohol! Nice. $17 for an alcohol swab!
Since I'm a stripper and all, cold sores are never welcome. Not that they would be if I wasn't a stripper. I'll just have to pretend I had a collagen shot and play the plastic surgery card. which I hate. I'm known in the industry for my natural assets.
Now, in addition to the cold sore, my nose is pealing and I look flaky. I can't find a better word for it: it's just flaky.
Happy Birthday to me!

Saturday, July 07, 2007

tongue piercing


D is a perfect coffee company. He always has an entertaining story to tell. He's somewhat insecure. Although a good looking man, he's always afraid he'll be judged or put to the test. He avoids any type of commitment and is scared that the Universe holds a huge conspiracy that'll eventually get him trapped.
We had coffee the other day. the argument of tongue piercing came up: is it sexy or not? then he told me stories of his newly acquired wife. He married her because she invested money in a new restaurant he'll open in Long Beach in December. He doesn't like the way she dresses, he doesn't like the way she thinks. They don't fuck. They live together in Hollywood in a perfect Hollywood marriage.
The wife went on a business trip for about a week. D invited his Thai girlfriend over for sex and cookies. Now the Thai girlfriend is presumably the best sex D has ever had. this woman can do things with her body that no regular human being can do: like morph into a suction pump and suck the living life out of D. When I asked D why he didn't marry her, he genuinely replied: "She's ugly, I can't marry an ugly woman."
When she came over to D's palce, she started her game with D. They got naked, all up and running and she went down on him. She vigurously liked and sucked every inch of his cock, went on to the balls and under the balls and her tongue piercing got trapped in some hair. They were stuck like this for about 10 minutes. She had tears coming down her face. They finally cut the hairs off with some scissors and liberated the tongue. I couldn't help thinking: did he walk to the place where he kept the scissors with her attached to his balls? Did she follow his steps while hanging off his balls by her tongue?
I don't know. The thing is: tongue piercing=not sexy!
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