perspective

He called. I answered, although I promissed to myself I wouldn't. He invited me over for coffee. I said yes. While getting dressed I was constantly repeating in my mind that I'd play cool, I wouldn't let him know that I missed him, I wouldn't bring back memories, I wouldn't talk about the past.
I put on a white shirt, nothing sexy or provocative, and jeans. didn't put any make up on cause I didn't want him thinking I got ready for him in any way. I stared at myself in the mirror for a while. Although I took my time getting dressed, I arrived at his house 15 minutes early. I sat in the car, listening to some lounge music and trying to avoid looking at passing byers. 15 minutes later I jumped out of the car and walked to his door. gave him a buzz to let him know I was arriving.
He welcomed me without a hug. He politely asked me how I was doing. I politely answered. we went inside his house. as soon as he locked the door he got that guilty face on that I very well knew. He invited me to sit down and blocked me half way brushing his lips against mine in the process. I pretended I didn't notice and sat down anyway. He started talking about film and filmmaking, our favorite subject. OUR favorite subject, even though there was no WE or US anymore. He took my hand and rubbed it for a while. I didn't listen to that part of the conversation cause all I could think of was: "Oh my God! He's touching my hand". While I was trying to say something, he pulled me to him and kissed me and all my thoughts dissapeared and I forgot what I was gonna say. Next thing I know we were having sex on his couch completely naked. When did we get naked? He was kissing me with lips and teeth and fingers and he was moving on top of me in a well known rythm. I was home. I knew this lovestory. His cock was coming in and out of me and I felt him painfully mine. He breathes hard over me but never really stops moving. He possesses me and I can't really do anything about it. I'm helpless in his hands and yet I don't feel the danger.
We didn't talk about the past, we didn't bring back memories, we just quietly lived this story from where we left it, as if no time has ever separated us.
Where did the hate go? Where did the finger pointing and the hurt go? We talk about the future and it just feels right. I guess it's just a matter of perspective.